gone bananas in bm

almost 17 years i've lived in malaysia.. i can therefore conclude that malaysians are a power-hungry, corrupted lot.. well most of the police are anyway.
and i'm now able to conclude another thing. STATEMENT. MALAYSIANS ARE DIRTY MINDED.

aiks aiks aiks. there i was sitting innocently in BM tuition class. paying attention to the teacher who was explaining about an essay that had to do with farming ( pertanian ). so he said that we also plant fruits in malaysia. then, he said that we malaysians don eat pisang nowadays ( bananas ). he said that we take it for granted. once the class heard the word pisang, a few DIRTY MINDED people laughed. i am naive and so did not understand of course :D. he then continued and said maybe we don like pisangs becoz it's not sweet enough. more laughter. then he said that in japan, only hotels have pisangs becoz it's very expensive. pisang malaysia very expensive. laugh laugh. moving on, he said but we only export the small pisangs. we don export the big ones like pisang ??, pisang ?? and pisang awak. i'm not sure if it's spelled awak but that's what we heard anyway. the whole class exploded with laughter. i was the only one who was not banging the table or snorting with laughter. ^^

the teacher looked at the class and said hai you all fikiran kotor la. betul ada pisang nama pisang awak. he continued, but you don la go to the fruit shop and tell the man, boleh bagi pisang awak? and that was the cue for the class to explode again.

ok, i know it was a short and lame post. but i guess i was out of ideas or i was just feeling damn sleepy. forgive me for i have sinned. eh? u heard? MALAYSIA BEAT CHELSEA!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!


still stuck on church - t pain. loving the song

M'sia, Thailand and premarital sex

here i go again. ranting on and on about something that will never affect the way the world goes round and around and around. there, i was ranting about the world.

anyway, right now, im feeling frustrated coz being the eldest sibling, i get the blame for everything.. AND I MEAN EVERYTHING! no matter whether it concerns me, no matter whether i was involved, I get blamed. and why? well lets see. the example my father gave when i ask why i get the blame for everything was about the law system of Thailand. he said: in Thailand, if a car and a motorbike are involved in an accident, the car will be the one who is charged in court, no matter whether it was the motorbikes fault or not.

now i know why i live in malaysia and not Thailand.. or rather why my parents drive in Malaysia and not Thailand. anyway, why the hell am i being compared to a bloody car? and my bro a motorbike? ok the motorbike and my brother similarity i can understand.. both are maniacs.. but why me and CAR? a car is not even close to being as innocent as me.. no way as smart as me. :D but yea, i guess a car can pikat more girls than me la. point is, this is malaysia la.. not thailand.. im a homosapien, not a vehicle.. you wanna give an example,give la a better one.. i have tolerated this 'oldest is the worst' frame of mind for about 8 years already.. NOW LEAVE ME ALONE. period.

now, my next one is not a rant, but rather a short comment on premarital sex. my first advice to those who are thinking of doing it, is to THINK TWICE BEFORE DOING IT ONCE. my next advice, it to take a piece of paper, split it into 2 sections and then write the positive effects on one side and negative effects on the other. and for the positive side, pls don write 1. IT FEELS GOOD 2. IT FEELS DAMN GOOD 3. I GET PLEASURE. write it out seriously and be honest with urself. i'll be darned if there are more positive effects compared to negative.

there are so many bad posibilities if you decide to have premarital sexual intercourse. worstcase scenerio is, well, a baby. that would be extremely bad as the couple is definitely not prepared to take care of another human being, and if they decide to abandon it or hide it from others... well, a pregnant girl is not exactly hard to spot is she? another thing that could happen is if your parents find out. surely, you will get a lot of scolding, but that is nothing if compared to what would happen if other parents found out. ULTIMATE SHAME. beat that.

done.and from now on.. any song i put at the end of a post is a song i'm currently listening to a lot. sometimes there will be more than one.

1. church- t pain
2. you and i- jason mraz
3. what you got- colby o donis (acoustic)
4. mauja hi mauja- jab we met soundtrack
5. same mistake- james blunt
4. this is real, this is me- demi lovato, joe jonas
5. unbreakable- fireflight

I then turn into a rude dude man
Why you had to **** up the night now we got to
fight ima knock out ya lights

Before the end of the night I'm gunna have to take your a** to church

cina orang no tau english

hey, i'm not being a racist or anything, after all, i'm half a chinese myself. but seriously a lot of my chinese friends cannot speak proper, understandable english. and guess what? i think i found the reason for their language problem.

see, i help my sister ( standard 2 ) with her homework every night. yes yes, i'm a nice person after all eh? :D.. so yea, i was helping her read her chinese book.. this chinese story book had the story in both english and chinese to help students in both languages. so there i was reading to her when i saw the english translation.


what should have been ' one day three rats came to a cylinder. after discussing, they decided to steal the oil for drinking' was instead translated as "one day three rats came under a cylinder, they discussed well, go to steal the oil to drink together."


another should have been ' the top rat thought: the oil inside is very little, if both of my friends drink until they are full, would I still have any?' but was instead translated as " the rat is thinking above ' underneath oil is few, if wait his a pairs to all drink, which would still have my? the drinks are good as to go down by oneself'."

see, i have uncovered the secret (gasp!) so, my dear chinese friends, if your parents scold you for not doing well in english tests and exams, tell them to sue the government instead for allowing the publication of such biased books.. ^^

world domination ( take 2 )

Hafzan suka picit orang,
dengan Hamin pula suka curang.

Hamin menggelek semasa jalan,
nampak 'lelaki hawt' pula berangan-angan.

Nadzrul masa dikira baru,
banyak sangat kita tak tahu.

Asrul suka sangat skip skolah,
tapi banyak datang pada hari main bola.

Mahmud semangat melampau tinggi,
patutlah mukanya cam monyet national geografi.

Izzat minat And1 dan bola 'terlanjang'
tapi moodnya tidak patut digoncang.

Jasper rupa macam budak baik,
tapi tahap 'horniness' boleh jugak naik.

Yoges lari macam kereta 'Subra'
dalam uniformnya pakai jugak 'singlet-bra'.

Victor hebat jugak berlagak budak Cool,
dengan pakaian dan muka yang tidak peduli rules.

Samuel tertarik sangat dengan perempuan,
dalam bas sama pun nak sms anak puan.

BoonJing skarang dah tinggi sangat,
tapi rendah diri bila nampak pompuan 'hangat.

LokChern pandai sangat melukis kartun,
tapi suka complain dengan apa-apa sajapun.



well, that's how i would describe my classmates. some things i did not mention cause it's a bit too sensitive :D hope you all know this is only for fun, so no hard feelings k.. just don do better than me in spm :P

World domination

okok, not world domination.. but class domination.. as most of you know, i study in an-all boys school ( yes, it's boring.. but we manage to live day by day thx to some young female teachers :D ) so i shall write a short poem ( well something that rhymes la ) about my class of 5 bestari.

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Loges, our dear KP,
how sote( botak ) can you be.

hafiz janganlah shuffle
nanti satu bangunan kena 'suffer'.

siddiq budak pura suci
tapi memang dah sangap Seri.

cheeyong kambing makan rumput,
nanti pelejaran pasti reput.

shengwei 'pui kia' semangat bola,
tapi arsenal tetap kalah.

sathi cuba menggoda cikgu math,
100 peratus dahlah cerewet.

jiajun ngan chor hian,
boy-boyfren sangat kesian

chor hian 'apek' kena jaga,
nanti tulang reput turun tangga.

jong yuh 'sifu' macam hebat wushu,
nanti tersilap kata lalalala-tuju.

vinod 'sicx' budak emo-giler,
tapi cakap 'banana' senyum saje.

adrian digelar 'childish and immature'
tapi subjek wanita suka lecture.

sukhvir budak baik belaka,
sports dan akademik always pertama.

hongjin suka sangat NBA,
nak slamdunk cuba sedaya upaya.

heman 'tuition boy'banyak alasan
tapi selalu escape dari punishment.

kianzhang 'cockroach' sangap main kad,
selalu dibuli oleh rakan yang 'bertanggungjawab'.

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am sleepy di, shall continue on hafzan, hamin, nadzrul, izzat, mahmud, asrul, yoges,
victor, jasper, samuel, boon jing and lok chern as soon as possible.. be patient boys :D